


I do not love you

by Sav_56



Category: The Last Hours Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Guns, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:27:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24008107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sav_56/pseuds/Sav_56
Summary: Please read the tags.
Relationships: Alastair Carstairs & Grace Blackthorn, Alastair Carstairs/Thomas Lightwood
Comments: 4
Kudos: 28





	I do not love you

**Author's Note:**

> Please read the tags.

Everyone around him was ghosts.

They didn’t matter. Not now, not ever. There was one and only that mattered something to Thomas.

“Did you miss him?” He asked, his voice trembling a bit.

His whole body was frozen in anticipation. In his soul was burning a little flame of hope. One pathetic, painful hope.

Alastair looked him in the eyes and without a flinch said, “All the time.”

With three simple everything. was. broken.

“Then why…” he hardly could speak. He was afraid if he did he would burst into tears. “Why did you go on a date with me?”

“Because I needed distraction,” Alastair said simply. He sounded almost bored.

“But…” Thomas choked with the words. His voice was barely a whisper. “You said you love me…”

“Look what, Lightwood,” to hear his last name said by Alastair, especially this sharply, was like a slap. What was worse was how _annoyed_ looked Alastair. Like he was dealing with some child. “After Charles, I needed to distract myself. And you was just the first idiot to be in front of my sight. The _perfect_ even,” Alastair had a smug smile on his face. Thomas felt sick. “So innocent, so _inexperienced_. Didn’t you say I’m your first? It was so nice to fuck with a virgin.”

“No,” Thomas shook his head. He wanted to vomit. “ _No_.”

“Lightwood,” Alastair looked him dead in the eyes. “I do not love you.”

•

Grace Cartwright watched how Thomas Lightwood was crying. It made her feel uneasy. He deserved better then that.

When he ran away down the street and disappeared from her sight she came out of the shadows.

“This was horrible,” she said.

Alastair looked at her, startled.

“How long have you been here?“

“Long enough to know he had to punch you.”

Alastair closed his eyes for a long moment.

He said huskily “Yes, he had to.”

“Seriously,” Grace said while walking to her car. “I knew you are a dick but this is a whole new level.”

“Shut up, Cartwright,” Alastair sounded tired. Grace felt pity for him so she didn’t say anything more.

When they both were in the car, Grace on the driver’s seat and Alastair beside her, they drived off.

“Did you tell him?” Alastair said after a while.

“No,” Grace admitted. “I… I couldn’t.”

Alastair eyed her.

“Ha,” he said expressionless. “And I thought you’re the heartless bitch here.”

Grace smiled a little.

“I suppose I am,” she shrugged, without taking her eyes off the road. “But… not to Christopher. He… he sees something in me that no one else does, not even me. And I couldn’t hurt him. Anyone but him.”

Alastair didn’t reply.

•

When they arrived at the park James and Ariadne was waiting for them. There wasn’t much people around. And thank you Raziel for it. Alastair didn’t want audience.

“Did you do it?” Alastair asked when he and Grace approached James and Ariadne.

James looked away.

“No,” he said. “I couldn’t. To look her in the eyes and to say I do not love her… I couldn’t.”

Alastair sighed. He remembered the look on Thomas’ face when he said he doesn’t love him. It was the most heartbreaking thing he had ever seen. His own heart was ruined. Alastair couldn’t care anymore, couldn’t even _feel_. Not after Thomas’ tears.

“I did it,” Ariadne said. It was clear she barely kept herself together. “I broke Anna’s heart,” she closed her eyes and whispered “When I promised I wouldn’t do it again.”

I’m the following silence Alastair felt sick. He understood Ariadne. To tell all this terrible things to Thomas was the most awful thing he has ever done. Alastair barely could stand himself in in the moment.

“Let’s do it,” he whispered. “They said we have to it in before the sunset. We don’t have much time left.”

They all nodded.

Grace and James first pulled out their guns. Then Alastair. And lastly Ariadne.

“One,” James said. There was tears in his eyes.

“Two,” Ariadne hoarsely.

“Three,” Alastair closed his eyes. He imagined Thomas’ face. He wanted this to be the last thing he see before he die. 

“Now!” Grace yelled.

They pulled the trigger.

**Author's Note:**

> If you think there is need more tags to be added, please tell me.  
> Thanks for reading :)


End file.
